Sometimes I wish I could be like other people.
The people I see who seem to be able to roll with the punches.
Take things as they are.
Live one day at a time, not worrying about what they cannot control.
I am not that person.
I got into a car accident yesterday and I hate that any time something bad happens it sends me into a tailspin.
I want to be okay.
But all I can think is what if my car is totaled? How will I get to work?
And I have no one to blame but myself.
Just when things were starting to turn around I go and fuck it all up again by accident.
I know things can’t be good all the time, but can I catch a fucking break?
It’s hard for me to focus on the good things in my life.
I really wish I could.
Things could have been much worse.
But all I can think is that they also could be better.
And I’m not even as bad off as some other people I know.
That’s what I hate the most – I can’t even hold my shit together when one thing goes wrong.
I was finally going to have some time to get things done this week that I haven’t been able to get to but now that’s out the window while I take care of all this car stuff.
Can I stop being an adult now?