Our understanding of gender, sexuality, and relationships is always evolving.

A friend recently shared a Facebook memory featuring the Attraction Layer Cake (https://cake.avris.it/) and we remarked that it is now dated, but neither of us knew of anything that’s been created since.

So I made my own graphic, differentiating between different types of attraction to make it easier for people to customize their experiences, without lumping attraction into purely sexual vs. non-sexual categories. I also added a category for libido, since sexual desire is separate from engaging in sexual relations.

I also added additional categories which can help to flesh out the type of relationship someone might be interested in creating, including whether those relationships are placed in a hierarchy or the level of emotional bond or commitment desired.

It still might not capture every important facet of attraction and relationships for every person, but it is a start!

And this is an example of what it might look like filled out

I also made a version that includes power exchange instead of sensual attraction (my skill at making graphics only goes so far, so to keep it symmetrical, the addition of every additional category actually means 4 additional categories).

Finally, since every relationship is unique, here is a blank copy you can fill out on your own, with whatever categories matter most to you!

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