I’ve been seeing a lot of posts on Facebook post-election about how we’re all in our own echo chambers and there’s too much fake news being shared on Facebook. So many people are arguing that we all need to research articles before liking or sharing, instead of just sharing something an article or meme because […]
Yoga and Trauma
I’ve been doing yoga off and on for over a decade. In some ways, tonight felt like my first class. Tonight is the first time in memory that I have not had to abort a sequence to go into child’s pose multiple times during a class. Granted, it was not a flow class, but that […]
What is Love?
Sometimes I feel like English breaks down for me and people are speaking a foreign language. Had dinner with a friend who is going through a break up. They said, of their now ex-partner, something to the effect of, “I love this person, but I am not in love with them. I mean, I care about them.” […]
Self-Regulation as Privilege
I don’t know if this is the next step, but right now I’m feeling a lot of anger. Especially towards my ex, but also just in general feeling angry about any situation where I was expected to be able to regulate my emotions in a neurotypical way. Because I’ve been living in this stark contrast […]
Relationship Anarchy Means Not Knowing How Many Partners You Have
In the four months since my most recent break up, I’ve done massive amounts of personal growth. When I first came to poly, it was because I fell in love with a friend who was already in a long-distance polyamorous relationship. I did a lot of work to learn about poly to be with her […]
Labor of Love: Thoughts on Domesticity
Perhaps for the first time in my life, I am living in a truly egalitarian household. It occurred to me today, as I was feeding the sourdough starter and making pancakes from the extras. One of my roommates had to run out the door, but said, “Please, save me one!” Three feminist femmes living together […]
Kids and Empathy
I’m teaching theatre for a local summer camp, which isn’t something I would have ever imagined I would do. And I think working with kids is giving me more empathy, not that I was lacking in that trait to begin with. But kids are just tiny humans who have big feelings and precious few skills […]
On Gaslighting and Superpowers
I’m not sure why I didn’t make the connection when I was watching Jessica Jones. But I think all superhero stories are an allegory for abuse. Something really fucked up and bad happened to you. Something that should have killed you. Something that would have killed anyone else. Only it didn’t. Instead, it gave you […]
The Path to Compassion
Like I said, I recently read Pema Chodron’s book When Things Fall Apart. Thinking about the book more yesterday, I realized that maybe I had misunderstood what she was saying. The book talks about feeling forgiveness and compassion when bad things happen to us, and sitting with the complexity of the situation instead of retreating […]
Sitting with Grief
I realize I’ve been seeing this process of grief as something to get through. In the wake of so many large changes and upsets in the past few months, I was beyond ready for things to settle. For things to feel okay. I wanted the grief to go away. I thought if I could sit […]